After the first miscarriage, I didn't research too much. I heard from so many people who had one miscarriage, then went on to have a beautiful baby. I assumed I would be like one of those people.
Since that is not the case, I am now reading, reading, and reading more to find out why this happened to us.
This is one of the best articles I've seen on the topic.
Monday, I go back to the doctor to make sure everything is back to normal. I am not 100% sure, but when I called yesterday, the nurse told me the doctor would try to do some blood work. I pray this gives us some answers.
We'll have to go back in the ultrasound room again. This freaks me out. We have yet to get good news from inside one of those rooms. On movies and TV, it's always the future mom and dad holding hands and smiling at each other as they hear a heartbeat. I long to experience that. The ultrasound room has brought us nothing but sadness.
On the plus side, I went back to school today. Some of my fellow teachers knew about what had happened, others did not. A few asked how I was doing. I just said that I was okay as long as I didn't talk about it. My kids were amazing today. They all greeted me with smiles. One girl almost tackled me with a hug and another said to me that she missed me "so much." Neither knew exactly how much those words meant to me. I made it through the day without a tear, so I call it a success!
I ordered a book yesterday. It's for a group that I am planning to join in January for women who are having similar reproductive issues. I can't wait to get the book in the mail.
Love,
C
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